Wednesday, 4 February 2009

Snakes on buses

I don't have any phobias, apart from not liking things that are much bigger than they should be (no sniggering at the back, boys). This includes things like extra big round cheeses on market stalls, or fish in aquariums that look like goldfish but are the size of sharks. And really big books, like the sort they have in churches.

So although I'm not scared of snakes, this - "it would have reached up to a person's hips" - is horrible, just horrible.

6 comments:

Old Holborn said...

"I don't have any phobias, apart from not liking things that are much bigger than they should be "

You must be petrified of the State

Kerry said...

No, because I'm not a paranoid right-wing conspiracy theorist.

The Penguin said...

What about Charles Clarke? Isn't he a lot bigger than he should be?

The Penguin.

Dave H said...

Kerry, they've only found one fossil, that could just as easily have come from a juvenile*.

I once saw a photo of the body of a man being cut out of an Anaconda. He actually looked quite cosy and peaceful in there, with with his arms by his sides.

Apparently they always swallow you head-first so you slip down more easily, analagous to the preferred direction for birth. A rather ironic way to leave this world.

(*not wishing to feed you words)

Kerry said...

Thanks Dave, that makes me feel a whole lot better.

What I don't get is this: if it comes up to your hips, and is the length of a bus, then isn't is a rather dumpy for a snake? Or do they mean a bendy bus?

Kerry said...

Penguin - I'm talking about things that are 10 times bigger than they should be. Nicholas Soames comes pretty close.